Reasons why Jackie should have ended up with Hyde not Fez
This is going to be a long-ass meta so brace yourselves. I’m still not over season 8 of That 70s Show. In my humble opinion Jackie and Fez are the worst pairing that was ever endgame (even though Robin and Ted from himym is a strong competor but more on that later). Jackie and Fez is just plain mismatched. Not only they have zero chemistry they are also completely wrong for each other. Even though I have recently found a forum full of Jackie x Fez shippers were speaking about how good they actually were for each other. “He has loved her for 8 years!” “He’s such a nice guy she just had to get over the fact that he’s foreign and they could work!” “She has always liked him!” So I’m gonna go through this show season by season and find all the reasons why Fez and Jackie were totally wrong for each other just because I’m bitter okay?
Season 1: This is when Jackie and Hyde hated each other and Fez had a crush on Jackie. Even though: 1) Hyde got pissed when Eric lied to Jackie, 2) Jackie tells Hyde:“If you wanna make out with me the answer’s PROBABLY no.” Probably. She doesn’t hate him all that much. Also 3) Jackie seeks comfort in Hyde’s arms after her breakup with Kelso, not Fez’s and 4) when Fez does try to comfort her she pulls away. She clearly likes Hyde much more than him even though she supposedly hates him. And then there’s my fave season 1 episode: Prom night. There are many important things in this one, this for instance: 5) Even though Fez is “in love” with her he doesn’t ask her to prom. He spends the whole night trying to get his english teacher to dance with him instead or 6) Jackie is clearly upset about something and Hyde asks her what it is. He DOES care about her no matter what he says and 7) he can’t stand the look at her crying so he does everything to make her happy. He takes her to the prom and helps her reunite with Kelso. He actually cares about her happiness. Also 8) he buys a tuxedo and a corsage for her despite his poor financial situation. Heck, he spent more money on her than he was willing to spend on Donna when he had a crush on her!
Season 2: This is when Fez is madly in love with Jackie while Hyde still doesn’t like her but at least they tolerate each other. 9) Fez makes a move on her in the dark when she thinks he’s Kelso. That’s creepy. 10) He also goes through her personal stuff without her consent whereas 11) Hyde is the only one who actually tries to get Kelso caught cheating on Jackie with Laurie. He also calls him out on his bad treatment of Jackie on numerous ocasions.12) When Jackie does find out Kelso’s been cheating on her she looks for comfort in Hyde’s arms. Hyde even says:“Why does she ALWAYS come to me?” This hasn’t happened for the first time. 13) Jackie vents to Hyde endlessly. They go on a “date” and she buys him shoes and 14) she gets upset again and cries and Hyde’s voice suddenly gains softness it doesn’t have when he’s talking to anyone else and he says:“Anything for you doll.” 15) Fez wants to take advantage of Jackie’s vulnerability after her breakup with Kelso while 16) Hyde tells him that she’s still on a rebound and he should give her space which 17) Fez doesn’t do and then gets upset when Jackie isn’t her usual super cute self. 18) Later, when Jackie is back to being her usual super cute self she openly rejects Fez and tells him that she only likes it when he worships her from afar. She likes the attention he gives her not him himself. 19) When Jackie is hanging out with Eric, Fez and Hyde and Eric, who really hates her asks why does she have to be there it’s Hyde who defends her presence there not Fez and 20) when Kelso and Laurie walk in and start provoking Jackie by making out right in front of her Hyde gets visibly pissed and so 21) he teaches her how to protect herself from Laurie’s insults and then 22) he invites her to the circle for the first time. 23) Jackie calls Hyde “the sweetest, coolest guy she knows”. Like has she ever said anything like that about Kelso, let alone Fez? No! 24) Even though Hyde still claims to be annoyed by Jackie he goes to prison for her without blink of an eye.
Season 3: Jackie has a big obvious crush on Hyde now and Fez has a big obvious crush on Jackie. 25) Hyde pretends not to like her back but he clearly does because 26) even when Formans threaten to kick him out of the house he still doesn’t tell anyone that the weed was Jackie’s and keeps covering for her. 27) “But Jackie and Fez went to roller disco together!” is a common argument of Jackie x Fez shippers. Okay, but that doesn’t mean she likes him back. She clearly still doesn’t. 28) “She wanted to have sex with him in that car but he refused because she was drunk and he’s a gentleman,” is another argument. How is Fez a gentleman?! Not taking advantage of a drunk chick should be normal because it’s the right thing to do! And yes Jackie gave him drunken consent but the next day when she was sober she turned him down again. 29) Jackie herself said that her and Fez will never happen. 30) Jackie tries to make Hyde jealous and brings a date to the Veteran’s Day barbecue and 31) she can tell it clearly works because 32) she understands Hyde better than most people and know that his:“That’s cool.” is just how he hides his real emotions. 33) Fez doesn’t seem to be jealous at all. 34) Her date turns out to be a jerk that just wants to bang her and doesn’t even like her as a person, so Hyde punches him right in the face. Hyde, not Fez because 35) Fez is just like that guy too! 36) Even Kitty knows Hyde likes Jackie even though he’s in denial 37) and says:“I can’t like her!” which means he DOEs like her he just doesn’t want to admit it. 38) He asks her on a “frickin’ date” during which 39) he teases her but doesn’t want to end it, 40) gives her his denim jacket and he himself only has a T-shirt on in November and 41) gives her his cola and 42) admits their date was no worse than bowling and he doesn’t hate bowling while 43) Jackie says it was the best date ever. 44) Then they share a hot passionate kiss during which 45) they both clearly felt something no matter what they say. 46) Fez himself admits that his crush on Jackie was just purely physical and 47) moves on and finds somebody else while 48) Jackie couldn’t care less. 49) In Valentine’s Day episode Fez says:“Be mine.” to Caroline and Hyde looks at Jackie and smiles. 50) When Jackie and Kelso want to get back together Hyde tries to stop them not Fez and 51) when they start dating again it’s Hyde who tries to break them up on multiple occasions. 52) When Jackie is getting her promise ring from Kelso she looks at Hyde and he shrugs as if to say:“I don’t know why are you with him.”
Season 4: Jackie and Kelso are together in this season and Fez is with Big Rhonda. They are not many Hyde x Jackie moments only 53) Hyde protects Jackie from the creep in funland even though 54) Fez was sitting right there and didn’t protect her. 55) Jackie brings an ugly girl to the Get Hyde a Girlfriend party and 56) Hyde offers Jackie a lowfive after she burned Eric and 57) they played Mary and Joseph in the Chrismas play for church. 58) Hyde likes Jackie in her cheese maid uniform and 59) teases her a lot during his season like when he drew a monobrow on her with a marker on the Snow Prom. It’s kind of like in kindergarden when a boy is pulling a girl’s braid. 60) She is the first person to say happy birthday to him and she kisses him on a cheek and they hug. 61) They dance together in the musical episode. 62) Hyde gets mad at Kelso for his constant whinning about Jackie kissing the cheese guy and calls him out on it and finally 63) when Donna opens the door and it hits Jackie, Hyde catches her.
Season 5: This is the season in which 64) Jackie and Hyde finally got together and Kelso wants to get Jackie back, while 65) Fez couldn’t care less. 66) Jackie and Hyde’s kisses are 100x more passionate than that one kiss she and Fez shared in 201 which was supposedly Jackie’s best kiss ever and 67) they frech like two french people on a frenching festival. 68) Hyde taught Jackie that she can’t always get what she wants while 69) Jackie made Hyde softer. 70) He shaved his beard off to cheer her up and 71) they both are planning a future together only after 3 months of dating and 72) Hyde makes Jackie realize that she doesn’t need a man to take care of her and she can have a carreer and make money herself. 73) Jackie herself says:“Steven, I know in my heart that the only person I want to fight for is you!” He is the only person she wants to fight for, not Kelso, not Fez, but him! 74) Hyde gives her a birthday gift that wasn’t expensive but is really sentimental and Jackie appretiates it. 75) Hyde, a guy that said back in season 2:“Why would you just want to cuddle with her when you can do it?!” cuddled with Jackie in his bed every night for three weeks while 76) Fez hides under Jackie’s bed while she is asleep and masturbates there. That’s the guy she ended up with, all right. 77)Hyde was really sorry about the whole nurse thing, even though I know it’s no way excusable he was feeling very guilty and 78) she’s the only person Hyde has ever said:“I love you.” to sober. 79) Even Donna said Hyde is the one for Jackie. 80) When Jackie heard that someone fell of the water tower she immediatelly worries about Hyde not Kelso, or Fez. 81) “I have never felt this way about a girl before. I wanna be with her.” Do I need to say more?! 82) “I know I love Steven because he’s smart and he’s deep and we have conversation and he makes me think which used to give me a headache but now I really like. But Michael is so beautiful!” The only good thing she can think of in Kelso is his looks while she doesn’t even mention Fez. He isn’t even an option for her.
Season 6: This season started with Jackie torn between Hyde and Kelso. Fez is married to Laurie. At this point the show is stirred into Jackie x Hyde direction not Jackie x Kelso or Jackie x Fez. 83) Jackie chooses Hyde. Not Kelso, not Fez, Hyde! 84) Even Kelso and Fez themselves ship Jackie x Hyde meaning they have both moved on and don’t want Jackie for themselves anymore. 85) Hyde himself admits that he wants to be with Jackie and 86) his half smile when he kisses her do I need to say more?! 87) Jackie can’t keep her hands off her Puddin’ Pop and 88) he likes it when she calls him that. 89) Hyde is slowly becoming whipped which is cute af, 100x cuter than when Kelso was whipped and 90) He says things like: “We’ve been tip-top since the moment I met you.” or “You make me happy.” and 91) only smiles like that for her. 89) he teaches her how to play chess and inspires her to read books. 92) even though he has some commitment issues he likes her in a wedding dress which means some day they are gonna get married! 93) Fez tells Jackie:“Don’t drink too much, I’ll take advantage.” This is the man she ended up with.
Season 7: This is when Jackie and Hyde are together and 94) even Fez seems to ship them and 95) he himself seems to have a crush on her ex boyfriend Kelso, not her. 96) Jackie is passive-aggressive towards Hyde’s father that abandoned him and defends Hyde to him with the words:“He’s perfect!” 97) She has never called Fez perfect. In fact I don’t remeber one positive thing she said about Fez over the years. 98) Jackie bakes cookies to cheer Hyde up. 99) After their breakup Fez supports her and helps them get back together. 100) Even Eric says Jackie makes Hyde happier than ever. 101) Hyde didn’t ditch Jackie because she’s his chick. 102) Kelso said to Eric and Donna:“ I think they (Jackie and Hyde) are going to last longer than you.” Yeah, but guess who was endgame and who wasn’t. Not cool season 8 writers, not cool! 103) Jackie says Hyde is the most important thing in the world for her and 104) he admits to the gang that he wants to marry her and 106) to Leo that he loves her. 106) He travels all the way to Chicago to propose!
“But Fez has loved her for eight years!” Jackie x Fez shippers say. Well, first of all, the show is set between May 1976 and December 1979 so no, he couldn’t have loved her for 8 years. And second of all, he stopped liking her in season 3 and never expressed any kind of interest in her again.
“He’s such a nice guy, she just had to get over the fact that he’s foreign and then it would work.” This is wrong on so many levels. First of all, Fez is not a nice guy. He stalked her and Donna through her window, went through their things, hid in Donna’s closet or under her bed to masturbate, tried to pick up chicks at the ladies’ restroom… the list goes on and on. Second of all, as an immigrant I wouldn’t want to be with somebody as xenophobic as Jackie.
“She has always liked him! You could tell by the way she looked at him!” Well, did you see the way she looked at Hyde in 225, 301 or 709???! Beacuse those were massive heart eyes!
“Jackie needs a guy that is as obssessed with her as she is with herself. She needs someone who truly admires her.” How is Fez that guy?! Fez never admired Jackie. He was disgusted when she had something stuck in her teeth on their first date. He ditched her on that wedding in 621. He treated her poorly, even in season 8 when they were supposed to be in love. He called her a bitch, a whore, a slut and a spoiled brat multiple times, locked her in her room while he was on his date with his crazy ex Caroline, told her she’s ugly inside and out, he dyed her hair green, he told her wearing makeup makes her a liar because she looks gross without it and the list goes on and on. The most outrageous was when he told her that he can’t be with her because she dated two guys before him while he dated and banged many and many chicks before her! Talk about hypocrisy and double standards.
In conclusion, Jackie and Fez were a damn disaster. Some people say that it wouldn’t have been if they had got together in season 2 or 3 but I think timing wasn’t the only issue here. They weren’t right for each other and had zero chemistry. Jackie and Kelso had great comical chemistry and were funny together but didn’t work either and Jackie and Eric were just nonexistent, I don’t get why do some people even bother to ship them. Jackie and Hyde were what worked for me and many other fans and that’s what should’ve mattered to the season 8 writers.
